JeffreyLipsey.com

I’ve finally gotten around to watch the first movie in the trilogy, and the fact that I watched them in reverse order might have helped. MIA3 had Braddock rescue his long lost son and wife and MIA2 had Braddock back in Vietnam as a POW.


In Missing in Action, Braddock (played by Chuck Norris obv) goes back to Vietnam after the war is over to rescue forgotten POWs. To do so, he must use the help of old colleagues that will turn up in the later movies.


Unfortunately, MIA doesn’t have nearly the over-the-top dialogue as the later two movies; it focused much more on plot than ridiculous action too. And, as any avid Norris fan would know: we don’t watch Chuck Norris movies for the plot.


Missing in Action must have been made during the time in Norris’ career where he didn’t consider himself a complete acting joke, where he actually tried to create good cinema. Little did he know that all he had to do to create all star movies was to not worry about the plot, but focus solely on dialogue and action.


In the movie itself, I wasn’t that interested in most of it; in fact it took nearly 2/3rds of the movie before Braddock even went to go rescue the hostages themselves. The first 90 minutes had him research the POWs’ whereabouts, barter for help and acquire the necessary equipment all while fending off some Vietcong hitmen. I guess that was interesting, but I really wanted to see gun slinging in the jungle! Not car chases and shitty bar fights (and, again, no dialogue).


Braddock’s rescuing of the hostages started out boringly slow with little to no build up of any ensuing danger. Maybe the fact that I know he lives through it all decreases my excitement? My lack of entertainment might have developed from the fact that I’ve seen it all so many times before in future Chuck Norris movies, and Missing in Action was just the start of them all.


Obviously though this was all written before the huge boat and machine gun scene that had the best visual effects and offensive attacking scenes in MIA by far. You can’t deny the fact that, after getting their motor boat blown up by an RPG, Braddock and Co. were able to swim underwater to a group of Vietcong and come up to kill them all. The best part: it was all in slow motion.


Unfortunately that one scene couldn’t make the rest of the movie interesting to watch and I found it all pretty boring. Good thing I saw the last two movies first, as otherwise I might not be as into the Missing in Action trilogy as I am today.

This was the first time I had ever seen Interview with the Vampire as for some reason I always found reasons to not watch it in the past. I knew that Tom Cruise and Brad Pitt shared roles in this movie, but I was unaware that Kirsten Dunst and Antonio Banderas had roles in it as well.


Seeing Kirsten Dunst was very creepy, like seeing twin Lindsey Lohans in Parent Trap creepy. I think Dunst did an incredible job in such a serious role for being so young, in fact I was quite impressed. Cruise looked pretty bad as a blond, although that might have been the intention; I wonder how it would have been different had he sported hair like he had in Last Samurai. I imagine he wouldn’t be as vampiric so they had to take that risk. Pitt’s consistent bitching about how he hated to kill people got real annoying after about 30 minutes, although that was the movie’s conflict in the end.


Truthfully, I think watching Moonlight on CBS the previous year has increased my awareness and likeness for vampire-related media. In a way Interview was a lot like Moonlight, more into the everyday lives as a vampire although the show had a lot less gruesome scenes. I would probably watch this movie again only because of the all star cast and maybe pick up on a few things I missed the first time around.


Either way, I would rather see Moonlight return to airwaves but I have a feeling that wont happen.

Going into Hancock, I didn’t really expect a whole lot given its just another random super hero script with an A-list actor. Will Smith did a good job with his acting, although I think the writing could have been better.


The first action scene of Hancock made me groan a little on the inside, as we see the drunken hero fly through the air. The first 30 minutes of the movie got pretty repetitive quickly, that was until Charlize Theron and Jason Bateman were introduced.


I wont give a plot summary, but Bateman’s character in my opinion is what made the movie believable.The story line was pretty predictable and the CGI was B quality at best (especially during flight scenes). I can’t fault the quality of the acting and if you think there was a problem with the acting then it is probably a script/director issue.


Is Hancock worth the $8.50 spent at the movie theatre + the $3.50 Code Red I purchased? Probably not. I’d recommend seeing it only for comical super hero value, and because it is a Will Smith movie. Otherwise, wait for it to come out on DVD; I don’t plan on seeing it again.

(Spoiler Alert)


I don’t know what was the worst part of the movie: Indiana Jones surviving a nuclear bomb or the aliens in the end. Actually, they may be equally bad. Just as I was about to forget the fact that Jones survived the bomb by stowing away in a refrigerator, Lucas shoves ‘inter-dimensional life forces’ down my throat.


Unfortunately, that’s all that I can think about when I hear Crystal Skull; not the otherwise interesting storyline or the stellar soundtrack or the clever dialogue. If you were to just cut the movie out in between these two points it would be pretty good (albeit a little short).


I don’t have much else to say about Crystal Skull; I was never one to get overly excited about the original 3 movies. Luckily for me I was expecting a bad movie.

Well, it wasn’t an “official” Missing in Action marathon, but it is close enough. AMC is airing this weekend several ‘memorial’ movies in honor of Memorial’s Day, and all movies have something to do with war. Today, AMC has aired Missing in Action 1, 2 and 3. If you aren’t aware of what Missing in Action movies are, basically its Chuck Norris kicking Communist Vietnamese ass for 2+ straight hours.


I was talking to one of my poker buddies online and he said he didn’t like Chuck Norris; at which point I declared my friend was dead to me. He said Chuck Norris can’t act. $#@$!!


First of all, anyone who knows anything about action movies, is that you don’t watch them for the acting. You can’t expect good acting when there is a 200 pound round kick to the face coming at you. That would be like saying you don’t want to watch a Steven Seagal or Sylvester Stallone movie because you don’t like them as an actor. That just doesn’t make any sense.


The true reason to watch any action movie, especially those made 20+ years ago: for as much over the top killing possible. Its a competition to see which action star could use the biggest gun to kill as many enemies as possible. And in MIA 3, Norris uses a combination grenade launcher, shotgun, bayonet and machine gun. I swear they were all built into one massive gun (and it was awesome).


Another thing about Chuck Norris movies: they aren’t boring at all. The dialogue and action has always been over the top but Chuck Norris movies all have excellent plot lines that keep your eyes focused on the TV (when they should be focused on the poker tables).


Acting? Who the fuck gives a crap about acting?

Unfortunately, Speed Racer debuted last weekend in a disappointing third place (no doubt due to bad planning) and after reading user comments (a death wish for intelligence) I found that people were bashing the movie. Now, whether they’ve seen it or not I have no idea. I would hope people would save judgment until after they’ve viewed it but you never can tell these days.


Never one to watch the show as a kid, I actually quite enjoyed the movie. The visual effects were excellent, the comic relief was believable and not annoying, while the plot itself was both complex and easy to follow.


Was it over-the-top? Was it cheesy? Hell yes. Frankly, that’s the reason why I loved it. The Wachowski Brothers knew that the dated 1960’s cartoon aired in an age where people were not obsessed with sex, language and action. Yet it still prevailed and continues to still have a cult following. Is it even possible to create a racing movie without those characteristics today?


I’d recommend Speed Racer to anyone seeking a wholesome family flick. The kids are going to love the graphics and race scenes while the adults will enjoy just about everything else.


I’m crossing my fingers for a sequel.

Yes, I know Doom looks bad. How could it not? It has several key factors that all lead to bad movies: It was based on a video game, it has super natural villains, and it lists The Rock as a key cast member. To my credit I wasn’t expecting a good movie so I wasn’t surprised to see The Rock chock up another bad one.

In fact, there wasn’t anything good at all about this movie. It had horrible acting (like I said: The Rock), even worse writing (remember: based on a video game) and god awful directing (ummm he sucks??). The plot revolved around some kind of virus that attached to humans as a host then turned them into rabid zombies, which could then be re-killed using normal bullets (sounds real original). There was a cure, however, but does anyone really care? (No.)

Possibly the worst scene of the movie was when our hero John (played by Karl Urban) got brought back to life and the director then decided to go into “first person shooter” (FPS) mode. If you aren’t familiar with what FPS is, we see what the hero sees from a first-person perspective and in this case he’s shooting people. The graphics during this segment looked worse than the interactive arcade games found at movie theaters (Area 51, Time Crisis 2) where the goal is to go around shooting terrorists (I fully expected to see the word “hostage” flash across the screen).

I’m starting to sound like a broken record when I say Doom sucked ass. But there may be a time when you and your drunk friends are wanting to watch a really bad action movie that also has The Rock in it, and Doom would be that movie.

The movie wasn’t all bad. I did have a favorite quotation from The Rock, as he yells after being shot: “But I’m not supposed to die!!”

No, but this movie was.

Technorati Tags: Doom, The+Rock, Karl+Urban

Unfortunately not even Chuck Norris could salvage Delta Force 2 from its own demise. It was no where near as good as the first Delta Force that I reviewed and that is mainly because the cast and writing just sucked ass. Delta Force 2 relied too heavily on stereotypes, bad writing and even worse acting.

Actually, I have absolutely zero complaints with anything to do with Chuck Norris in this movie. His lines were well written, he can act and frankly he doesn’t even have to speak and it’ll be a great movie. However, the Columbian-style drug lords as well as Norris’ commanding officer (played by John P Ryan) were just plain bad. You know, for a drug lord these guys had no clue on how to fight a drug war, let alone run a business.

Throw away that the movie was predictable; I just got real tired of having to deal with that retarded jackass that is Norris’ General. Not only did he over act every one of his lines, it seemed like the General yelled everything he said. The only thing that would make him more towards a stereotypical commander was if he had a cigar in his mouth. Even then I think it would be better because his voice would be muffled and I could choose to not understand him.

By the end of Delta Force 2, I got extremely frustrated. I’d prefer Norris just work alone Rambo style than have to deal with all these fucking stupid side characters. This is one of those movies you wish was actually worse than it was, because then you know it couldn’t have been any better. But I can see the potential that Delta Force 2 could have had with a little better writing and a better supporting cast; which is why I got so frustrated.

My recommendation: Watch it for Chuck Norris, but thats it. Then go do something productive because you just wasted 2 hours of your life.

Technorati Tags: Delta+Force+2, Chuck+Norris

In George Clooney’s directorial debut Confessions of a Dangerous Mind, he goes through the life of Chuck Barris (based off an autobiography of the same title), famous game show creator and supposed undercover CIA operative. Barris lived such an interesting life that I won’t even pretend to do describe it with this review, as I’ll leave you to watch the movie for yourself.

Chuck Barris is the creator of such game shows as The Dating Game and The Newly Wed Game and the creator/host of The Gong Show. In his autobiography, Barris claims that while working for the CIA he killed 33 people in several countries as a chauffeur for The Dating Game. However, the film did not directly dispute this fact although at times we were supposed to believe he was mentally unbalanced.

Sam Rockwell starred as Chuck Barris and Drew Barrymore as the lead actress Penny in Confessions of a Dangerous Mind (they both acted very well). Clooney also starred in the film as Barris’ CIA contact while Julia Roberts had a rather prominent role as a mole in the CIA. You can’t expect a movie that Clooney directed without cameos from all his buddies; Brad Pitt and Matt Damon had unspeaking roles as contestants on The Dating Game (their hairdos are hilarious) while Maggie Gyllenhaal also had a few lines of dialog.

I kept waiting for the ‘ah-ha’ moment in Confessions, where we learn that Barris was actually crazy and we learn what actually happened (ala A Beautiful Mind). However, that never occurred and, while I am slightly confused I can’t say I’m disappointed. I hope it is true, that Barris was actually a CIA operative (makes for a better story). Although the CIA has continuously denied Barris’ accusations (which is rare for them), Barris continues to neither confirm nor deny them.

Confessions of a Dangerous Mind was a very good movie (If you don’t believe me read what Kevin Smith had to say here; he thought it was the best picture of the year; he mentions it at the bottom of the article). George Clooney did a fantastic job directing and with an all star cast you will agree with me that this is an awesome flick.

Technorati Tags: George+Clooney, Confessions+of+a+Dangerous, Mind, Chuck+Barris

I first saw SLC Punk 4-5 years ago on a random whim and I was both surprised and delighted to see an independent film with a B-list cast and an unknown director to be so good.

Starring Mathew Lillard as Stevo, SLC Punk (short for Salt Lake City Punk) analyzes the punk music scene in Salt Lake City in the 1980s. I know what you’re thinking: of course there isn’t a punk music scene in Utah, but that doesn’t stop these two guys from rocking out! No, this movie is not about head banging or pot smoking or drinking (although obviously its there); rather, its more about the life of a young self-proclaimed anarchist struggling everyday in a conservatively overbearing society.

SLC Punk also had its funny moments. When Stevo and his friends go to Wyoming to buy booze they completely freak out the locals at the liquor store. The clerks think that these punk-rockers are devil worshippers but Stevo just says his friends are from England. England (of course!) is why they are so fucked up.

The movie reminded me of a combination of a high school or college type drama/comedy (like Loser or Slacker but much better) and one that provokes thought (Magnolia-ish, a toned-down version of Requiem For a Dream maybe). The voice-overs were always well thought out and moved the plot quite well (what voice-overs are supposed to do) and allowed us to gain a much needed 1^st person perspective.

I can only give a movie so much praise, but other than some slow moving scenes SLC Punk really is a great flick. I highly recommend it.

Favorite Quotes:

1) Stevo: It’s like fucking Jesus Christ took a shit and it landed right here, so you can be happy all you fucking want.

2) Stevo: You see life is like that. We change, that’s all. You see, the guy I am now is not the guy I was then. If the guy I was then met the guy I am now he’d beat the shit out of me. Those are the facts.

Technorati Tags: SLC+Punk, Mathew+Lillard, Punk+Rock